Bleeding Neon

The summer issue of HRH, the Hard Rock Hotel’s boutique magazine, actually came out a few weeks ago, but I was waiting to post about it until after the digital edition was live. And so it is. And so here we are.

I don’t have too much to say about my cover story on Them Crooked Vultures. Like my Muse story for the spring issue, I didn’t have a chance to interview the band (Them Crooked Vultures isn’t really doing much press), so I had to make 1200 words about a year-old rock supergroup appear out of nowhere. Thankfully, I did get a chance to see the band when it performed at the Joint in the spring, so I at least had that. To fill in the gaps, I had to use a handy-dandy series of “behind the scenes” videos Them Crooked Vultures posted on its YouTube channel. Really, it wasn’t much different than doing a basic interview with the band or being provided B-roll from a publicist, so it kinda worked out fine … I think.

As usual, my words are enhanced and accompanied by live photos shot by my pal Erik Kabik, who always does amazing work. But even more than that: I share a contributors page with one of my heroes, Cameron Crowe. Crowe, who is a good friend of rock photographer Neal Preston, turned out for the HRH issue release party/Preston photo exhibit at the Hard Rock’s new SkyBar — an event I also attended. Sadly, though, I had to run off to catch Henry Rollins at Wasted Space and left the party before Crowe arrived. I don’t know what I would have had to say to him, but he’s one of the few people (Rollins being one of the other) whose work and career has really shaped my life and I’d be interested in meeting. Well, I’d actually be more interested in learning from him, but one must crawl before he can walk, right? Right.

I meant to write a review of the Hard Rock Hotel’s new HRH Tower last week after staying there, but, um, got busy as usual (deadlines, blah blah blah), and then next thing I knew, there was a cantina opening over here and a restaurant opening over there, so … here’s the 10-day-old review. With pictures.

Last Friday, Team Awesome visited the Hard Rock Hotel to check out the new HRH Tower, which is basically the Hard Rock’s answer to other boutique branches of major casinos such as MGM Grand’s Signature and Mandalay Bay’s thehotel. The HRH Tower is fully pimped out in refined, ultra-modern luxury, with no suite smaller than 700 square feet. It boasts its own valet, entrance, check-in and services. One could, in theory, check into the HRH Tower and never step foot inside the casino (assuming you’re eating room service only and limiting your drinking to the juice bar outside the spa). But what fun would that be?

Our room was one of the Supreme City King suites, all decked in whites and cool grays, featuring  living and sleeping areas divided by a half-wall (with flat screen TVs on both sides), an over-sized bathroom replete with Roman tub and stand-up shower, an integrated jukebox system that also supports iPod/iPhone connections and a bunch of other stuff we probably didn’t use. It looks something like this:

In addition to the comped room (there’s your disclaimer, blog police!), we had a $50 dining credit, so we used that to make a dent in our bill at Rare 120º, the Hard Rock’s steaks-and-cocktails joint that overtook the space formerly host to retro-flavored AJ’s Steakhouse. Though I was sad to see AJ’s go, I have to admit Rare is pretty awesome. The cocktail menu is creative, the service doesn’t suck, and the food selections are a cross between tapas and traditional steakhouse fare — which means Sara enjoyed her filet mignon as much as I did my rice cracker tuna. At about $100 for both of us, it’s not the priciest dinner in Vegas, but it’s also not somewhere you’d eat every week, either.

Our room was KISS-approved

After dinner, we signed up for the Hard Rock’s Rockstar players club, and spent a few hours feeding bills to penny slots to earn enough points for a comp at Ago, a promotion the Hard Rock’s offering for a limited time. We didn’t win any money that night after dropping about $35. I’m sure the next stop for most people would be Vanity, the new club in the HRH tower whose very name ensures I’ll never set foot in there, but we opted to enjoy our plush room and some “Law & Order” on the 40″ TV. The bed was comfy, though being only five stories up, our room overlooked the roof of Vanity, so the pulsing beats coming from the club did permeate the sanctity of our chamber until about 3 a.m.

Overall, it was a fair reminder to me that, despite the proliferation of douchebags (of both genders) on weekend nights, there’s still something about the energy of the Hard Rock that appeals to me, even after 15 years. And the HRH Tower adds just a whole new level with its more mature new casino, spa and services.

Yep, it’s another photo by my pal and ex-partner-in-crime Greg Thilmont from the Gumball 3000 car rally at the Hard Rock Hotel back in ought-six. That’s Chef Kerry Simon next to me, watching Tony Hawk and pals rock some skateboard badassery on the huge half-pipe set up in the casino’s parking lot (interestingly, that lot is now the new Joint theater). We were in the gated safety of the VIP/press area, as I just finished getting quotes from Simon for the story I was writing.

Bonus (because I forgot last time, sorry Greg): The Gumball 3000 video report shot by Greg and poorly narrated/edited by me:

Greg and I did finer work, somewhere else on my YouTube channel.

Would you trust this creep when he says "close your eyes?" I DON'T THINK SO, PALLY.

Thursday: Went to see Anthony Cools at the Paris Las Vegas Hotel & Casino, home of the world’s largest Eiffel Tower that isn’t the Eiffel Tower. Cools is one of those stage hypnotists whose shtick is making allegedly hypnotized audience members do lewd and ridiculous things on stage like disrobing, performing faux sex acts and generally acting like asses. However, despite the predictable and questionably authentic antics, I couldn’t help but actually enjoy myself. And worse, I believe I acquiesced to “going back” at some point after leaving the show Thursday night. What.

Friday: Opened escrow on a house. No biggie.

Saturday: Attended the Vegas Magazine Sixth Anniversary Party at Pure nightclub inside Caesars Palace. I have gone to the Vegas mag anniversary parties every year since 2006, and until this year, they were always held at large, outdoor venues: Green Valley Ranch Resort’s pool in 2006, Mandalay Bay Beach in 2007 and the Palazzo Hotel & Casino’s pool in 2008. These events were typically massive gatherings, involving (at alternating times) daredevil motorcyclists, a live scorpion pit, go-go dancers inside giant floating bubbles, a graffiti wall and, sadly, an American Idol finalist.

Pretty much all you need to know about Saturday night.

But perhaps as an indicator of our weak (but recovering? Right, Obama? Yeah?) economy, this year’s fete was scaled back considerably. First, it was in Pure, which I typically despise. But apparently it’s not such a horrible place when it’s filled with people you know and like as opposed to wall-to-wall d-bags. Secondly, there were no death-defying stunts, pools or annoying singers to be found anywhere. But there were models in fluffy pink wigs, Pussycat Dolls dancing and, supposedly, Vegas mag cover girl Heather Graham hiding somewhere among the masses.

Most importantly, thanks to an equally scaled-back guest list, there were plenty of easily accessible bars serving free drinks and, well, within a two-hour period I may have had more than my share. OK, so a few of us had more than our respective shares. And I may have stumbled out of the club, past the throng of waiting suckers–er, clubgoers–and had to be driven home due to a certain lack of brain-body coordination. But I guess that’s to say, “Thanks, Vegas Magazine for getting me sh*tfaced. Happy anniversary!”

Sunday: Band practice. Working on a cover of Helmet’s “Unsung.” Realizing how bad of a drummer I am. The rest of the band ran through the song without me and they sounded pretty good. Then I came in on the drums and OH MY GOD WHO LET THIS MAN JOIN A BAND DOING ANYTHING OTHER THAN PLAYING THE SKIN FLUTE MAKE THE NOISE STOP PLEASE HELP.

"Dios mio! My fingers are motherf*cking possessed!" Photo by Erik Kabik | Retna (www.erikkabik.com)

Later that night, as if to destroy my fragile musical ego even further, we headed to the new Joint inside the Hard Rock Hotel, Casino & Den of Debauchery Even On a Sunday to check out “Supernatural Santana: A Cash Grab on One Man’s Lifetime of Music Featuring Unknown Singers Performing his Greatest Hits.” Yes, Santana is the first rock band to hold a residency at the Hard Rock’s revamped venue, and … hell, it’s Santana. Carlos and his band churned out the songs we all know and love — “Oye Como Va,” “Black Magic Woman,” Maria Maria,” etc., etc.  — as well as a few lesser-known tunes that surely only hardcore Santana fans know from one of the man/band’s 36 albums. But despite the music — and band’s — age, Santana poured as much passion into this material as if the songs were days old and not decades old. Sure, the imagery of doves, pivotal moments of hope throughout the last century and the changing face of Carlos Santana was all a bit schmaltzy, but even Carlos’ occasional mini-speeches about love and God and whatnot couldn’t break the rockin’ vibe inside the Joint, even if at times it felt like a church revival.

Oh, and assuming last night wasn’t a lark, the verdict’s in: The new Joint is a goddamned better venue by leaps and bounds than its predecessor. I mean, I already reported on its improved visual appearance, but after actually experiencing a live performance there, I can honestly say that the Pearl (inside the Palms Resort & Whatever) has sonic competition — though the Pearl’s seating arrangements are still far superior.

Patrick Berge, John Meglen, Carlos Santana, Mayor Oscar Goodman and Randy Kwasniewski cut the cord on the new Joint. (Photo by Erik Kabik / Retna)

I was not a fan of the Joint concert hall inside the Hard Rock Hotel. Oh, sure I saw dozens of shows there — including Modest Mouse, Morrissey, Marilyn Manson, No Doubt and Air — but its cavernous, boxy design, poor sightlines, impossible bar situation, echoey sound and irritating traffic flow made it somewhat less than a stellar live music venue.

But with the property-wide remodeling of the Hard Rock, the Joint has been shuttered (closed down with a two-night stint by Motley Crue) and across the casino floor, an entirely new Joint has been erected. The $60 million venue is double the size and capacity of its predecessor — adding 700 fixed balcony seats and seven VIP suites  — yet retains the relatively intimate feel audiences have come to know, with no seat more than 155 feet from the stage.

Designed by renowned Montreal architectural firm Scéno Plus, the new concert hall incorporates new features such as wireless internet access, a full blogging station for media and 38 flat screens throughout the venue. Oddly, the blogging station, located near the main doors next to the balcony escalator, is not within sight of either one of those flat screens or the actual stage.

Despite that minor complaint, I have to admit: It’s a beautiful improvement over the old Joint. The general floor area now has multiple, staggered levels (unlike the two sharp drops in the original). The bar area, which caused much misery due to its proximity to the exits and its understaffing, is now greatly expanded and enclosed behind half walls. With glass and steel accents, lighted guitar fretboard walls and multiple viewing levels, this new Joint feels like a real, modern concert venue and not a makeshift gymnasium — a distinction it had to make once the much-better-equipped Pearl concert hall opened at the Palms a few years ago.

Of course, the real proof of success will come when the first shows hit the new Joint this weekend: The Killers on Friday, Avenged Sevenfold on Saturday and Sir Paul McCartney himself on Sunday. Not that you’d be able to get tickets to the Friday or Sunday gigs, but Aveneged Sevenfold — if that’s your thing — still has spots available. If anyone goes to any of this opening weekend’s shows, swing back by here and let me know how they went. I’m curious if the sound in the new Joint is as much of an improvement over its predecessor as its aesthetics already have proven to be.