Bleeding Neon

Lolita’s Cantina & Tequila Bar might be awesome. It might have delicious, Mexican-inspired food. It may have tasty cocktails crafted with precision by expert mixologists. But even though I attended the VIP opening event last week, I can’t tell you any of that. The event — by the time I got there, at least (fashionably late, but by no means overly so) — was overcrowded, to the point I couldn’t properly assess the layout of the venue, nor even easily make my way to do so. It was hot. And after waiting at the bar for 15 minutes behind just one person, I gave up, and frustrated, just grabbed my girlfriend and left.

There were, to be fair, servers bringing around appetizers … not that any of them stopped for us. However, if there were servers carrying pre-made cocktails (at an event like this, there should have been, to ease bar traffic), either they stopped serving mid-party or never made it my way, but I didn’t see them. Apparently there was supposed to be some 3-D technology happening. Again, if there was, I never saw it. What was there? There was an emcee roaming the event with a wireless microphone, loudly addressing crowds over the DJ’s beats. There were groups of people ordering what seemed a dozen mojitos at a time. There was a venue design that seemed unable to accommodate a reasonable flow of traffic — not a good thing for a location touting itself as a nightlife destination.

There seems to be a trend with these restaurant-club fusions opening at Town Square lately. Like nu sanctuary (which is located directly below Lolita’s), these venues appear to be iterations on the same old restaurant/nightlife concept touting themselves as something new, different or even innovative. But their opening events have been messes, no better than your average touristy nightclub experience: too many people, overly loud music, understaffed bars — none of which lead me to believe they’re doing anything unique or distinctive. Yes, you don’t want an empty room at a party — it doesn’t look good for the people in attendance or the post-event press release. But 1,200 people packed into the VIP party for Lolita’s, and I can’t say for sure, but that feels a bit uncomfortable for even the 10,000 square-foot space (and who knows how much of that is customer-accessible area?).

This is how these things typically work: venue soft opens, works out the kinks, then invites media and whatever “VIPs” to an event. This event is the first (and possible only) chance to make a good impression, to make the venue appear to be as awesome an experience as heralded in advance press releases. Now, sure, the experience of those in attendance should somewhat resemble that of the general public, so that we can relate the best assessment of the restaurant/club/bar/whatever. But at the same time, if you’re going through the fuss of designating an event “VIP,” then the idea is to make sure those in attendance are taken care of, beyond opening the doors and the bar.

Here’s the thing: I want to say nice things about Lolita’s. I want to marvel at the 3-D entertainment, indulge in strong shots of tequila, snack on some contemporary Mexican cuisine. Hell, I was even looking forward to it. And it’s not fair to judge the place based on one overcrowded, overheated event. But often, as I said, this is a business’s only chance to make a first impression, and if it’s a bad one, I’m not likely to go back of my own volition.

One of Las Vegas’ most in-demand photographers — and one of the nicest guys I know — is Erik Kabik. In addition to being everywhere in town, shooting red carpets and VIP events for wire photo service RETNA, Erik is also the house photographer for the Hard Rock Hotel, a post he’s earned thanks to years of shooting live music. I’ve been lucky enough to have Erik’s concert imagery accompany multiple features I’ve written for HRH magazine.

To celebrate 20 years of shooting concerts, Erik’s favorite concert photos will be on display at the Mandarin Bar on the 23rd floor of the Mandarin Oriental hotel at CityCenter on Monday, May 17. If you get a chance, stop by the reception from 6 to 8 p.m., where long-time Vegas DJ Shoe will be spinning the tunes while Ty Ku provides complimentary cocktails.

Erik’s subjects on display will include The Grateful Dead, Jay-Z, Kings of Leon, Dave Matthews, Madonna and much more. If you’re a fan of music or photography, I highly recommend checking out his work.

As you fine people may know, I like to try to spread around my boundless wealth to as many good causes as possible, mainly because I’m far too busy ascending toward global domination to actually shovel food for the homeless or read to burn victims or whatever.

One of the charities I’ve very visibly supported for longer than I can even remember is Aid for AIDS of Nevada, a Las Vegas-based nonprofit whose mission is to provide “support and advocacy for adults and children living with and affected by HIV/AIDS in Southern Nevada.” How does AFAN do this? By working to reduce HIV infection through prevention education, providing services to those affected by the disease such as housing, transportation, food, nutritional counseling and legal assistance.

Every year around tax time, AFAN holds AIDS Walk Las Vegas, which serves both to bring awareness to the community and to raise beaucoup fundage for the organization. This year’s walk — the 20th annual — is being held on April 25, and as always, your pal Pj will be walking. It’s more like a big block party than a boring old charity walk — there’s live entertainment, vendors, colorful characters, food and drinks, and, of course, thousands of energized, awesome people ready to take to the streets of downtown Las Vegas.

I kindly request (and slightly urge) you to help the cause by either a) sponsoring me as a walker or b) joining our team and walking with us. I’d prefer “b,” but will definitely take “a!” This year, I’m walking on the Harrah’s Entertainment/Penn & Teller team, which means that for every dollar you guys donate on my behalf, Harrah’s will match that donation! Isn’t that cool? IT IS.

So I hope to either see you at 8 a.m. on April 25 at the World Market Center, or see your name pop up in my donation page “Honor Roll.” Thanks! In the meantime, enjoy a slideshow of photos from the 2008 AIDS Walk:

Film producers put out dozens of films. But rarely are their works compared to each other, or expected to live up to a standard established by its predecessor. So why do we do that with Cirque du Soleil shows, specifically their Las Vegas creations?

Oh, sure, the first wave of original, non-linear, mega-circus productions such as Mystère and O feature trademark vibrant costumes, mind-blowing artistry and awe-inspiring sets, all wrapped in a sense of whimsy and wonder orchestrated by their creator, director Franco Dragone. Dragone left Cirque to form his own entertainment group, and since then, the company’s subsequent shows (such as Kà and Zumanity) have diverged from what the general public perceives as the established Cirque status quo, when in fact, they’ve diverged from the Dragone standard.

Since then, Cirque has entered into collaborations for its Vegas shows that have been of, well, questionable success. With The Beatles LOVE, the company produced a much-loved, critically lauded show that even spawned a Grammy-winning soundtrack album. That show stays true to the “traditional” spirit of Cirque du Soleil, never letting either the vague biographical story of the Beatles or the circus performances feel forced. Of course, maybe the Beatles’ eclectic music was always destined for the circus.

On the other hand, Criss Angel: Believe has been … less enthusiastically received. Blame the lack of magic, blame the creepy rabbits, blame Criss Angel’s own lack of charisma and general douchebaggery — whatever it is, Believe proves that not everything graced by the Cirque du Soleil name turns to gold. Or even bronze.

Hence, we come to Cirque’s latest collaboration, Viva ELVIS, which — in case you couldn’t figure it out or have been held hostage from the internet lately — loosely tells the story of Elvis Presley’s life through song, dance and trampoline tricks. On its own, ignoring the Cirque du Soleil name, Viva ELVIS is an adequate, enjoyable musical, featuring an integrated, energetic live band performing along with Elvis’ vocal tracks, enhanced by live singers. It’s a whitewashing of Elvis’ career, of course, leaving out all the ugly parts about drug addiction, affairs and, oh yeah, getting fat and dying. And it’s narrated by an actor portraying Colonel Tom Parker, Elvis’ notoriously manipulative and corrupt manager who, here, appears as a genial carnival barker.

So what makes it a Cirque show? There are kitschy, giant set pieces, such as a blue suede shoe, a guitar and a wedding cake, and acrobats performing feats of derring-do upon them. There is a fun but totally out-of-context trampoline segment. There are aerialists and colorful costumes and creepy plastic Elvis wigs. But unlike The Beatles LOVE — and yes, I’m going to compare here, because these are both Cirque-spawned shows based on the music and lives of giant rock stars — Viva ELVIS lacks that, well, certain je ne sais quoi that makes LOVE so fantastic. There’s no emotional investment. No build-up. No surprises or small, touching moments. It’s just all flashy showmanship, all the time, and even then, some scenes went on too long and could not maintain entertainment value.

Viva ELVIS feels more like the Broadway version of Hairspray, if you removed characters for whom we care about, a storyline we can follow or a genuine feeling of nostalgia. If you just purely love Elvis’ music, and dig musical theater, it may be right up your alley. But if you’re expecting the otherworldly, transcendental experience of earlier Cirque shows, your money’s best spent on a discounted ticket to Mystère.

I meant to write a review of the Hard Rock Hotel’s new HRH Tower last week after staying there, but, um, got busy as usual (deadlines, blah blah blah), and then next thing I knew, there was a cantina opening over here and a restaurant opening over there, so … here’s the 10-day-old review. With pictures.

Last Friday, Team Awesome visited the Hard Rock Hotel to check out the new HRH Tower, which is basically the Hard Rock’s answer to other boutique branches of major casinos such as MGM Grand’s Signature and Mandalay Bay’s thehotel. The HRH Tower is fully pimped out in refined, ultra-modern luxury, with no suite smaller than 700 square feet. It boasts its own valet, entrance, check-in and services. One could, in theory, check into the HRH Tower and never step foot inside the casino (assuming you’re eating room service only and limiting your drinking to the juice bar outside the spa). But what fun would that be?

Our room was one of the Supreme City King suites, all decked in whites and cool grays, featuring  living and sleeping areas divided by a half-wall (with flat screen TVs on both sides), an over-sized bathroom replete with Roman tub and stand-up shower, an integrated jukebox system that also supports iPod/iPhone connections and a bunch of other stuff we probably didn’t use. It looks something like this:

In addition to the comped room (there’s your disclaimer, blog police!), we had a $50 dining credit, so we used that to make a dent in our bill at Rare 120º, the Hard Rock’s steaks-and-cocktails joint that overtook the space formerly host to retro-flavored AJ’s Steakhouse. Though I was sad to see AJ’s go, I have to admit Rare is pretty awesome. The cocktail menu is creative, the service doesn’t suck, and the food selections are a cross between tapas and traditional steakhouse fare — which means Sara enjoyed her filet mignon as much as I did my rice cracker tuna. At about $100 for both of us, it’s not the priciest dinner in Vegas, but it’s also not somewhere you’d eat every week, either.

Our room was KISS-approved

After dinner, we signed up for the Hard Rock’s Rockstar players club, and spent a few hours feeding bills to penny slots to earn enough points for a comp at Ago, a promotion the Hard Rock’s offering for a limited time. We didn’t win any money that night after dropping about $35. I’m sure the next stop for most people would be Vanity, the new club in the HRH tower whose very name ensures I’ll never set foot in there, but we opted to enjoy our plush room and some “Law & Order” on the 40″ TV. The bed was comfy, though being only five stories up, our room overlooked the roof of Vanity, so the pulsing beats coming from the club did permeate the sanctity of our chamber until about 3 a.m.

Overall, it was a fair reminder to me that, despite the proliferation of douchebags (of both genders) on weekend nights, there’s still something about the energy of the Hard Rock that appeals to me, even after 15 years. And the HRH Tower adds just a whole new level with its more mature new casino, spa and services.